Day 9: Commitment

A friend reminded me today about something I have often said to her and to others: that in order to accomplish anything, one must be committed to doing it. And in this sense, "committed" means more than just having the intention or merely wanting to do it. Intention and desire are important, but they will only get you part of the way. I think the commitment comes from the intention PLUS taking the attitude that you will let absolutely NOTHING stand in your way... and then backing all of that up with action.

I do think commitment is the key to achieving pretty much anything in life. I know for me that the times when I've wanted to do something, no matter what it might be, and I've felt that strong inner sense of commitment, of not being willing to let anything get in my way - that's when I reach my goals.

When it comes to me and weight loss, I have spent too many years secretly (or perhaps not so secretly) believing that although I WANT to be thinner, it's not "in the cards" for me, or something. I think that I long ago (like, in childhood) classified myself as someone who wasn't strong physically and never would or could be, someone who had an imperfect body that I'd never be able to fix so why make an effort, someone who couldn't compete on a level playing field with others physically (and I hate competition anyway) -- so I just gave in and gave up and ended up living into those beliefs as my reality. That reality includes thoughts like "I can't do that, I'm not strong enough, I'll never be strong enough, ergo I'm not good enough".

Olivia Ward, "before"she found her inner and outer strength.

Ouf. Well, screw that!

Now my challenge, in getting my mind committed so that my actions and body will follow, is shifting those beliefs. Some people who have had success at weight loss in the past, or who were once thin, can look a back at those times and at least know what it looked like and felt like; they can sometimes tap into that successful thin and fit energy again, and use it to propel themselves forward to regain that level of health.

I am not one of those people. I have never in my adult life been thin or really fit, and although in high school I was not heavy, I was heavier than some of the other girls my height and age, and I thought I was humongous. And as a dieting adult, I have never, ever gotten to a goal weight while on a diet plan. Trading on past weight loss success simply isn't possible for me; even when I've managed to lose as much as 30 lbs (which is the most I've ever lost, after which I would eventually gain some or all of it back, and often MORE. Same old story, right?)

Olivia winning The Biggest Loser. -129 lbs? Incredible!

Which is why I find that it helps to look at other people who have achieved significant weight loss and use THEM as my inspiration, to say "Why NOT me, too?" instead of "How great for THEM but that can never be me!", and to say "Yes, I COULD wear that!" when I see a slim, sexy dress in a shop window (or on someone else) instead of immediately going to "I could never wear that!"

Note to self: Do the work, then Yes! YOU can, too!

So right now my commitment is not only about doing the WW program and following the steps, including sticking to it no matter what, even after I've had a "bad" day - but my commitment needs to also be about consciously shifting my thoughts to something that will help me be successful.



How I did yesterday: Overdid it a little (or more than a little) - a typical "bad weigh-in day" reaction for me. Not beating myself up, however.
How I'm doing today (so far): Moving on from yesterday's overindulgence, and about to get in a major "housecleaning" workout. Let's sweat!